Believing in Good

SubwayI’m on the subway this morning. My usual commute from Brooklyn into Manhattan. It’s about 9am and business is as usual. About half way to work, a man walked onto the train and made the following announcement:

“Good morning Ladies and Gentlemen. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day. This morning, I’m going to sing you a song. If you enjoy the song, your donations are appreciated. And by donations, I don’t only mean money, but also a smile or a kind gesture.”

(Hmm, I’d never heard that before …)

The man proceeded to go into a crackly rendition of Ben E. King’s song Stand by Me. After he sang, I watched him walk up and down that subway car, just smiling. I gave him both a dollar and a smile, and then, I watched as he did something pretty uncommon in these situations. He made complete eye contact with me with a big smile on his face and said thank you as he reached out and shook my hand. Uncontrollably, smiled a really big smile right back.

As other commuters walked by, they smiled too and he said to them, “Thank you for smiling!” He reached out and shook the hand of anyone that smiled and thanked them for doing so.

In just a matter of the few minutes it takes between train stops, I’d bet he made a few people’s mornings. I have lived in NY for almost ten years and have seen my fair share of subway performers, those looking for handouts, and of course—the wild nuts of the bunch. But I have never really seen someone on the subway quite like this, just radiating kindness.

It would be easy to take the skeptical route. I know New York City well and I could certainly assume that his positivity is “just part of a plan.” But, as we all know, assumptions break one of the Four Agreements. I’m choosing to believe in the warmth I felt, the kindness I have inside of me, and the gestures of others that can change someone’s day … and in this case—mine. It’s always those little moments that nudge your spirit and remind you that’s it’s wonderful to be alive and to be grateful for all the gifts around you.

So, although this morning’s commute was nothing extraordinary, it certainly was a positive nudge to kick off what’s to be a great day! It moved me to share this story and to nudge you too. To remind you to choose to believe in good. It doesn’t make you gullible, it simply makes you happier. As I write this, I think of Eddie Rodriguez, founder of Smile and Wave America. Eddie is part of the Morning Coach community. He is a shining example of kindess and a true inspiration. You may have heard his story or even be a friend. Eddie has persevered through heart wrenching struggles, and instead of letting those struggles take him down, he created a movement of happiness. He has dedicated his life to smiling and waving from the goodness of his heart in an effort to make the world a happier, kinder place.

So have a wonderful day, everyone. Be kind. Feel the kindness of others. Be grateful. Believe in good things. And of course, don’t forget to smile!

Rachel Aubrey is a personal development coach, entrepreneur, and an award-winning graphic designer with over a decade of experience in business, branding, and marketing. Her experiences and ongoing commitment to self-growth and development have led her to her passion of helping others unlock their true potential and achieve success through coaching. Connect with Rachel online!

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Have Faith!

iStock_000014923612XSmall[1]What is faith and what does it mean to you? Faith is defined as “trust, hope and belief in the goodness, trustworthiness or reliability of a person, concept or entity”.  I, like so many others have had many challenges in my life and what has never changed is my unwavering faith.  I knew with faith to keep moving despite the low periods of hurt in my life.  In the book, A Course in Miracles, “There is no problem in any situation that faith will not solve”.  One thing is for certain, this profound statement has helped me through thick and thin and continues to resonate with me today.  I know that the God, Spirit and the Universe are conspiring for my greater good and these tools have helped me along the way. 

Change Your Beliefs.  James Allen’s quote: “by changing my beliefs, I change who I am.”  With faith I started once again to believe in myself and had the perseverance to change my beliefs in order to attract the many splendid things and wonderful people that have manifested in my life.  

Ditch the Attitude.  The one question I kept asking myself, “What kind of life do I want to be living?” With faith my resolute answer to this question, “the creation of life and all its beauty and bounty is a miracle and I want to live enjoying life.” When the student is ready the teacher will come.  When I focused with faith and determination, I learned to ditch my stinking thinking attitude.  Every lesson is a blessing and you have to grow through what you go through.  Yes, I sure had my days to go through and learned valuable lessons along the way.

Charity.  During the low time in my life I could always turn to charity and helping others to pick my spirit up.  Giving to others takes the focus off you.  I went through my days asking “How may I serve?” It felt good in my heart when I was helping others and eventually found my purpose in life.  I found that becoming a Personal Development Coach I could provide a service with good intention to  the world.  With my faith, spreading love and kindness while helping others.

One of the reasons I joined Morning Coach is that it’s very spiritual and not religious. Like-minded people “open to life”. They have faith in the big picture of life and they are living in faith ultimately eliminating fear, worry and doubt from their lives.  What I know for sure is that we are never alone.  Sharon Salzberg, Faith: Trusting Your Own Deepest Experience, teaches: “In contrast, faith helps us approach life with a sense of possibility rather than foreboding or helplessness. It dares us to imagine what we might be capable of. It enables us to reach for what we don’t yet know with a measure of courage.  It gives us resilience in times of difficulty, and the ability to respond to challenges without feeling trapped.”  My own faith has taught me that whatever challenges I face, I pick myself up, dust the hurt off, and try again, trust again, and love again.

 

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Peace of Mind

iStock_000003178724XSmall[1]There are so many people in today’s society disconnected from their extraordinary lives and living worrying about not being good enough, not having the right car, can’t find the right partner,  the house is not big enough you get the picture I’m drawing?  The sad truth is that they are relentlessly trying to keep up with the Jones next door and wishing their lives away waiting and hoping for what may or may not come and not being of peace of mind to accept and be happy and grateful for what they have right now.  Former Zen priest, Josh Baran, Tao of Now teaches, “We can find magic, the spiritual and peace of mind in the ordinary.” 

Staying mindful.  When you stay mindful in the present moment it helps you focus and stop the incessant chatter of Ego in your head.  “Peace is an attribute in you.”  Whenever I need to stay focused and stop the chatter I repeat these affirmations from the A Course of Miracles, “I could see peace instead of this” and   “this is my life and my time is right now “when I catch myself wondering into the past or worrying about the future.

Forgivness.  Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love eloquently teaches forgiveness and summarizes: “Forgiveness is a full time job, and sometimes very difficult. Few of us always succeed; yet making the effort is our most noble calling. It is the world’s only real chance to begin again.  A radical forgiveness is a complete letting go of the past, in any personal relationship, as well as in any collective drama.”  Affirm, “All that has offended me I forgive and I fully and freely release you.”

Gratitude.  I choose meaning, responsibility and contribution going forward and live with profound love and gratitude for what I have in my life.  There is not one thing I would change during my lifetime.  I love the woman I have become and what I am blessed with and enjoy on a daily basis.  The trials and tribulations I have endured have shaped me into a person who can promote good in the world.  Living in gratitude has given me peace of mind.

In the Dalai Lama’s book, The Art of Happiness, compassion is the key to tranquility and peace of mind.  He teaches “that being compassionate is actually in your own best interest. And a symptom of your own peace of mind is that you can share comfort with others around you.”  As I continue on my path, I aspire to live with more compassion for those around me, with humility, forgiveness and gratitude.  Peace of mind is an internal matter and I truly believe that I would rather have peace than be right.  A beautiful lesson learned.

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Follow your dreams like your life depends on it…Because it does!!!

It was getting closer and closer. Graduating from college represented a critical transition from the structure of formal education to the quote on quote real world. During this time I was bombarded with the question that a typical college graduate to be receives right before graduating, “so what are you going to do”? With student loans to be paid, and the economy in a recession, my instinctive response was to reply, “get what ever job I can get”. Yet my true response was, “do what I love to do”. Follow your dreams

During my last 2 ½ years of college I was given the opportunity to work as an event coordinator in my school’s student government organization. Planning events became an outlet that allowed me to express my creative side, as well as bringing people together for a common cause. I have a quote that I came up with that explains my perspective towards this profession,” I am not much of a painter, therefore I plan events”.

From cultural fairs to student trips, I took abstract ideas that originated in my mind and turned them into events that would have a positive effect on people’s lives. The sense of community that came from planning events, brought people together to enjoy an experience that I created, and I wanted to continue to do this long after I left college. So after completing 4 years of collegiate education I got a job as a carny!

Because employment was scarce, I approached the job market with a trajectory goal perspective. Meaning I would be happy with any job so long as it fell within the event planning umbrella. I called vendors that I used to hire while working at student government to see if they needed help, and long behold I was hired by a small entertainment management company as a quote on quote production coordinator. Although I had a fancy title, my true responsibility felt more like a carny, which was to work a video booth system called Booping Heads.

From bat mitzvahs to city festivals, I was in charge of sitting people down in front of the camera and recording them while they made total fools of themselves on the screen. My personal self talk soon became a haunting reminder that sounded a little bit like this, “4 years of college for this”. But I had to be pragmatic; at least I was working within the event industry. I had a dream that I couldn’t compromise regardless of the circumstance, and took a life or death approach towards my goal.

The most common scene that I saw coming out of college, was that of students who traded in their dreams for a “safe” pay day. I cringed when friends of mine took on career paths that they were not interested in; all for a job that was supposedly secure and in demand. It was as if lives were being taken for the sake of a false sense of security. I believe that we must follow our dreams at all cost, it is our duty and responsibility to do so in return for the gift of life bestowed upon us.

After my short tenure as a weekend carny, I met my friend and mentor JB Glossinger who during a casual conversation brought up the idea of coordinating events for something called MorningCoach.com. Let’s just say…I hope you can make it out to our upcoming Intelligent Life Design Event.

Never compromise your dreams…

LuisLuis Rosario is the Director of Communications / Event Relations for MorningCoach.com, with an educational background in Sociology and Inter-cultural Communications. His mission is to change the world for the better one event at a time!

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The Simple Life

iStock_000005145500XSmallI have always been a hard working, driven person who comes from a family of the same kind of work ethic and perseverance. Sort of the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree type of thing, I suppose.  I grew up in a modern day Horacio Alger “Rags to Riches” world.  It shaped my mindset from an early age.  I didn’t spend much time with my family growing up because they were busy working.  I was left to pick up those same mindsets for myself and my future.  It was the foundation of my esteem…work hard, persevere, and succeed.

As I became an adult, I was in full swing.  I started my own company at the age of 24.  I worked side jobs for income to pay my house payment until the business was generating steady revenue.  I worked long hours and often missed out on social time with friends because I was working or was so tired that I wasn’t fully present during those family and friend get-togethers anyway.

When I got married and had children, I didn’t really slow down.  I just squeezed it all in.  I often felt like I was wearing an invisible Wonder Woman cape or something to keep all the plates spinning.  Working, running a business,raising children, trying to be a good wife,  entertaining, etc.  I didn’t allow any plate to stop spinning in the eyes of the world.  But inside that complex web of responsibility and pressure, I was disappearing slowly.  My identity was shaped more by my labels…wife of successful healthcare practitioner, who was also very driven just like me, physical therapist/owner of a healthcare business, and mother of two. Over time, I simply lost “me”.  I was merely acting out my labels and not developing and evolving “me”.  To spend time and effort to nurture me would be wrong and selfish I told myself.  Sadly, with the loss of “me”, came the greatest loss and failure of my life, the loss of my marriage and family unit.

This event was so devastating and  profound that over the past decade I embarked on an incredible journey of personal evolution and spiritual growth that has been nothing short of amazing.  I read spiritual texts and books, attended classes and workshops, listened to podcasts and prayed and meditated at a whole new level. But you know me and those plates, I kept them spinning to provide for my family and to keep my esteem in check through those patterns of behavior that go way back…working hard, perseverence and pressing for success. Wow, those patterns are strong!

Now in my latest decade of evolution, I am finally taking on the new mindset of simple living and simply living the Bible verse, “Be still and know that I am God.” , consciously.  I recently sold a high maintenance property for a small low maintenance one.  I sold everything in my previous place and only bought the essentials for the new place.  The funny thing is, now that I have less stuff, I feel like I have more awareness, more time, more finances, and more freedom, just to name a few.  But with my personality, (I think you have a clear picture of that by now), this is a slippery slope for me to navigate, as it sort of presents a vacuum in my life.  My first inclination is to keep juggling all those plates.  But that would be the easy choice since that’s what I know so well.  This time, however, I am exploring something different for me… the idea that being still, trusting God and simple living are actually  precious gifts that merge my behaviour patterns with my most true and authentic self.  It is the gift of freedom to have time to think and feel more, time to learn new ideas and interests, time to meet new people and time to develop the “me” that was lost for so many years under the yoke of relentless hard work, perseverence and success at all costs. My new mindset, based on simplicity, is to work smarter, not harder; to make wellness part of each day, not just when I gain a few pounds or  get sick; and to show up in my relationships with God and others, as the real me, not just the business me or mother me, but simply me as light shining into the world through my core values, talents and innermost purposes along with all those inevitable shortcomings.  So far, it’s been incredible.  I feel happy and at peace at a greater level than ever before.  I am noticing so much more around me, be that in nature, in people, in God and surprisingly, in myself.

With that, I really encourage you to take a serious look at your life now. Don’t wait. Are you just throwing more plates in the air to spin because your family or society thinks you should? Don’t make the same mistakes I have. Take action now to “Be still” and simplify your life. I encourage you to be brave and begin to take the necessary steps be it small or large.Your spouse and children will thank you in the long run and your inner self will thank you each and every day for the peace, joy and fulfillment you are expanding into.  Keep me posted on your steps to the simple life.

Traci Vincent

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