Like so many people today, I once was lost in a mental state of victim-hood. I lived with a heavy heart and was immersed in negative feelings which manifested quite frankly into alot of illnesses. Many of those illnesses were a direct reflection of my inner struggle and it was made true in my outer world. Wayne Dyer writes: âIf you put the seed of failure into the subconscious and feed it with feeling that way, it will reproduce failure. If you plant the seed of disease into your subconscious mind by feeling this way in your body, it will augment disease for you. If you plant the seed of misery into your subconscious mind by feeling miserable, it will cultivate and produce misery for you.â  Â
I had to change and change I did. It was time to plant the seed of pure love. ”God is love, and with God, all things are possible.â  This statement changed my life. I began to feel Godâs love again.  With the true power of awareness I started to create the life I dreamed and wanted and more importantly the life that God intended me to live. The depth of profound joy in my heart brings tears to my eyes.
Be yourself.  For most of my life I role-played and allowed others to define âmeâ.  I am finally living just being. I had to step back from those who insisted on defining me. Their limiting beliefs were causing a problem for me. Believe in yourself, accept yourself and learn to affirm that âI am enough and I am myselfâ.
Focus on your inner power. Shakespeare wrote: âThere is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.â Stop focusing on your weaknesses which keep you in a mental state of negativity. When you are aware and in-tune with your inner source you can shift that mindset when you tap into your strengths and your true power.
Make peace with the present moment. Life is experienced in the present moment. So many people live their lives with resentment and blame because they are so focused on the past or so caught up about worrying whatâs going to happen next in their future. Start to take responsibility for your life and live in the present moment and make peace with it.Â
Learn to live with love. Daily I remind myself to live in gratitude and count my blessings. I really try to keep judgement and criticism out of my life.  It’s difficult, but just being mindful has helped me change those negative thoughts of criticism.  I choose to live in kindness and pass that on.  This quote from Dalai Lama recaps inner peace and happiness beautifully:â As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery…we have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace. The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as anger, attachment, fear and suspicion, while love and compassion and a sense of universal responsibility are the sources of peace and happiness.”
It’s all about choice, choose wisely my friends.
Debra Moser
When I was 22 and just starting out in my military career I was laid-up in the orthopedic ward of a military hospital after having reconstructive surgery on both my legs. I experienced firsthand what it felt like not being able to walk. I was wheelchair bound.  It is normal after major surgery to have no sensation until the nerve activity between brain and legs would connect and I could start walking again. So the road to recovery was at that time insurmountable to me and I was angry and frustrated. I was in the Airforce and just wanted to get home and back to work. Patience was definitely not my strong suit back then as I laid there wallowing in misery and acting like a child.
Every morning when I woke, I would be visited by the surgeon. He would ask me to try and lift my legs one at a time. With all the strength and willpower I could muster I tried to no avail. This daily routine included a trip after breakfast to physiotherapy. After being helped into my wheelchair, off Iâd go to my 2 hour physiotherapy class. When I entered the physiotherapy center I was surrounded by World War 1 and 2 veterans and other military service personnel going through gruelling treatment. I was asked to get off the wheelchair on my own and hop down to the gym mat where I was joined by others; one of which had lost his leg. I was humbled into silence as I watched these brave men day after day go through the agony and struggle to gain their life back. When I returned to my room and hoisted myself up onto my hospital bed I laid there and cried and prayed for those men. I learned a valuable lesson that day.
Those times when I became flustered and impatient I reminded myself of those brave men. I had an attitude adjustment from God. Everyone in this world at some point in their lives will experience adversity. I learned that no one can control what happens in life. You can only control how you respond to it. I was inspired and changed to a âCan-doâ attitude. No more self-pitying tears I forged on as I had plenty more work to do if I wanted to walk again! I did not surrender to self-deprecating feelings of defeat and persisted in my physiotherapy classes with grace and the will to walk again. I worked very hard and refused to give up.
After weeks in the hospital I awoke one morning and was able to lift my legs. I cried with joy and laughter and then gave silent prayers of gratitude. A patient and positive attitude has paid off.  Affirmations can help you through your challenges. From the Dynamic Laws of Prosperity by Catherine Ponder declare: âI refuse to give up. I shall continue firmly, steadily and insistently until my good appears.â  I have learned how the power of changing my attitude and having patience has worked for me. Keep moving forward living your best life with persistence, kindness and loving patience.
What is Kaizen? It was created in Japan after World War II.  âKaiâ in Japanese is change and âzenâ is improvement and kaizen is based upon the principle of continuous improvement.  I first came across this word in Anthony Robbinsâs book, Awaken The Giant Within. Anthony writes: âthe Japanese understand that tiny refinements made daily begin to create compounded enhancements at a level that most people would never dream of. The Japanese have a saying: âIf a man has not been seen for three days, his friends should take a good look at him, and see what changes have befallen him.ââ
 Kaizen philosophy has made an indelible impact on my life and it can be applied to every aspect of your life.  It is about making a commitment and willingness to change. There is always room for improvement.  Itâs about moving forward; one small step at a time.  Â
Write it down. What needs improvement in your life?  Write it out! Do you need improvement in your business, finances, health, relationships? Make the commitment and gradually start implementing these changes.  At the end of your day, ask yourself: What did I improve?  Â
Live in the moment.  The past is gone and the future is not here. Focus on living in the moment, being open to seeing the lessons around you and having the willingness to learn and improve. Every day I work at improving my life.Â
Every one of us is here in this world to be happy and successful! I am constantly learning, growing and wanting the best in my life. When I know better, I do better. I never stop trying to improve.  Are you getting results you want in your life? What needs improving? Â
 Small improvements are believable and therefore achievable! â Anthony Robbins
Do you really know how to relax? I know for me it took me awhile to really let go and relax and in my younger years the one word that would drive me around the bend was - Relax! Was I really that wound-up? What is the true meaning of the word ârelaxâ? It is defined as âto make less tense, rigid or firmâ.  Wow, in hindsight this definition described me to a tee. I was nervous, tense and frenzied most of the time. Unfortunately, it was the environment I was living in. My first marriage was toxic and I could never really relax. I was walking around on egg shells and wound tight! So, do you feel like you are constantly living in a state of crisis?
Thankfully, I found the strength and courage to leave that unpleasant situation and with guidance, patience and love I learned how to live and âchill-outâ. I would like to share the tools that helped me accomplish complete relaxation:
Laughter â the bodyâs natural relaxant. Watch comedies, join a laughter group it has proven to reduce stress and increase your immune system. Studies have shown that it reduces the levels of the hormone cortisol in your body. I love to laugh!
Deep Breathing Exercise â When I find myself getting anxious or tense I do a deep breathing exercise. This exercise can be done anywhere. It calms the mind and balances the emotions. Sit straight with your hands on your lap and close your eyes. Focus on your breathing. Start inhaling slowing and deeply to a count of 4 seconds. Hold your breath for a count of 7 seconds and then release and exhale slowly for a count of 8 seconds. You will instantly feel a sense of calm.
Get moving â Any form of exercise will regenerate your energy and help release stress from your life. Get moving whether it be a light walk, a slow swim, yoga class or dance! You will feel wonderful.
Music â Any genre of calm music will help you quiet the mind; keep you focused in the present moment and slow the pace down to relaxation.Â
Naturally, it has taken patience and practise to cut out the drama from my life. These techniques have served me well over the years. I respond differently now to situations in my life.  When I take a couple of minutes to relax with any of these strategies it keeps me centered and once relaxed it allows my creative energy to flow. I now live with complete gratitude and Iâm most definitely a more peaceful person to be around! This too shall pass. Let Go and Trust. â A Course in Miracles
When I was younger I made bad decisions based on the influence of the so called âfriendsâ I kept in my life. Looking back now I can see how these friends were in my life because of the way I saw myself and I manifested these relationships.  I attracted these people because of my diminished self-esteem.  I kept myself trapped in the perpetual cycle of victimhood.  I knew I had to make a change in my life because I intuitively knew I wanted better. It was one of the hardest decisions I made; letting these âfriendsâ go.  As it turned out, it was the best choice. I started working on my personal growth. Moving forward with a changed positive attitude, with a heart full of forgiveness and accepting responsibility for my destructive behavior.  Letting go of the past and living in the present moment with love and kindness toward myself and with others. I evolved through my self-exploration and changed my limiting beliefs, old patterns and became a strong confident person.  Is there someone in your life who is not contributing or supporting you moving forward?
Let Go.  I have asked myself this question and had to let go of some of my friends. It was difficult but in the end, being surrounded with like-minded positive people who support  and love me and share the same positive outlook in life far out way being associated with sad and miserable people who donât see the good in anything.  I knew that I was sad and miserable in my life and had attracted these negative people who kept me in the âvictimâ mindset. Randy Gage writes: âYou canât be a victim and move forward in life.â  I let the negative friends go and finally let go of victimhood and moved on.Â
Change your environment.   I joined Morning Coach because it is a community of like-minded positive people who enjoy their lives and want better. We all celebrate triumphs and support each other when there are challenges all in a positive way. I donât have to prove my value and I know that I can contribute with love and kindness the way it has been reflected back to me. Join networking groups such as mastermind, attend conferences or go to meetings to connect with new exciting people. Â
Here are a couple of questions to ask yourself when you sit back and take a look at the people you have in your life. How do they add to your life or are they taking away from your life? We are all here to help each other serve the greater good. I am now moving forward in my life progressing and shining my light surrounded with loving, kind, positive people doing the same.  Take responsibility for your life now and move in a positive direction with the right people. Don Miguel Ruiz so eloquently writes: âWe have to be what we are, so we donât have to present a false image. If you love me the way I am, âOkay, take me.â If you donât love the way I am. âOkay, bye-bye.â Find someone else.â
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