Toys: How to Have Joy

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For those of you who may not know, I am a multiple credentialed nurse practitioner currently practicing high-risk pediatrics for our local hospital.  Life can take a fast dramatic, life altering turn at any moment.  I am constantly reminded of the very fragility of life and the deep gift of each day.  I never know what will happen when I walk through the door or when the phone rings.   Here at the hospital, there is no place happier on the planet when things go well and there are few sadder when they do not.  For the first eighteen years of practice, I did not know how to handle the stress.  I simply carried it in my body. I was SO serious, the perfect example of how not to do it!

I know, all too well, we are all here on this planet for only so many minutes, hours, days, months, and sometimes years.  I like the priest in the movie Rudy have learned two things from working here: 1. There is a God and 2. I am not Him. When you work with children, you learn they play even in the midst of unthinkable pain.  They smile, laugh, and joke.  They can make a toy and game of almost anything.  After years of watching, I have learned to relax and trust.  I am in no way cavalier.  I practice expert, evidence based, medicine and include the parents in my decisions. I have contagious quiet joy with me wherever I go.

If you were to follow me around all day you would find me talking happily to my patients, their siblings, and parents.  I am gentle and cheerful with the staff.  Should you happen into my office you might be surprised to see amidst the text books and photos,  a group of toys, strategically placed up on the bookshelf at eye level so I can see them. There is a can of purple silly putty, an orange bouncy ball, a yellow rubber duck, a slinky, and white bunny finger puppet. There are also a few rocks I have collected while out on walks to clear my brain and a sea shell or two. Front and center you will see half or a board I broke last year with JB, Billy Beck III and my morning coach compadres. If you turn on my ipad you will find all the medical apps and of course games and puzzles.  These are my reminders. You do not quit playing because you get old, you get old because you quit playing.

I know how to play and love it.  Do you?  Do you take yourself or your life too seriously?   Take it from one who did for years and paid a high cost. It just “ain’t” worth it! Look at me, the grandmother of ten!

So how did I do it?

I became more like my patients

I learned to be child-like

I made peace with God and myself

I realized (gasp) I am not perfect (never will be)

I rediscovered I love toys

I love to play

I love to turn the music up really loud and dance and sing

Now it is your turn:

Lighten up!

So buy some toys!

Turn up those cheesy old songs that make you laugh

Get outside even if you need foul weather gear like we do.

Play!!!

This is the only shot we get at this life.

Have some fun.

Find it in the least likely of places!


IMG_0105One last thing should you find a motorcycle jut sitting there with a cute French Air Force Officer near by in Paris, ask him if you could hop on!  Need any hints?  Contact me!

Grace and peace,

Lori

LoriElgin.Com

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Appreciate Abundance!

iStock_000014064091XSmall[1]What does it mean to you to have abundance?  Abundance is defined as “a great or plentiful amount”.  Maybe you define abundance by having a wallet full of cash always at hand and living a fabulous life on the island of your dreams. No problem with that if you can but are you one of so many who live their lives in want and desire for what they can’t have and miss what they really want is right in front of them.  The truth of the matter is that no amount of money, nicer climate or fancy job will make you happier until you are at peace within yourself and most importantly appreciate the abundance that surrounds you.  

Focus on what you have.  Are you saying to yourself “I don’t have the money and can’t afford to invest in me?” Stop thinking about what you don’t have and let that negative energy go.  Step into your fear, embrace it and start believing. Shift your focus on what is good in your life and invest in your personal growth and you will be successful. Robert Collier writes “The formula of success is belief. Bring all your thoughts, your desires, your aims, your talents into the Storehouse – the Consciousness of Good, the Law of Infinite supplies and prove these blessings.”  Count your blessings – not your troubles. – Dale Carnegie

Appreciate abundance.  When you start appreciating what you have in your life the Universe has a way of giving you more. Live in gratitude, acknowledge and be grateful for what you do have.  “Offer grace for the bounty of goodness. Raise the song of harvest home, the glass of good cheer, the heart overflowing with joy. We have so much for which to be thankful.  So much about which to smile, so much to share.”

Prosperity Affirmations.  When you write in your gratitude journal of the six things you are grateful for in your day, take time to also jot down a couple prosperity affirmations.  Spiritual teacher, Iyanla Vanzant teaches: “Affirmations are a backup to prayer, since once you request something; the affirmation confirms your belief that has been given. Affirmations are a positive step toward bringing into your existence all that you need and want.” The more you affirm the more you will believe.  So when you are having a rough patch in your life try affirming the following “I can hardly wait to see the good that comes from this”.

I want to leave you with this important question you should ask yourself that I read from Randy Gage latest book: “treat this question with the reverence it deserves. Am I holding on to certain beliefs because they allow me to validate behavior that is keeping me from my greatness?”  

I am so grateful to you and honored that you take the time to read my blogs and comment.  I am blessed to be part of this Morning Coach community.  I wish all my American friends a wonderful, blessed Thanksgiving holiday.  Be safe, eat well and enjoy the bounty of friends, food and family that surround you!

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The Science of Gratitude

iStock_000014366259XSmallHere in the United States, we celebrate Thanksgiving on the fourth Thursday of each November.  This tradition dates back hundreds of years as a celebration of good harvest and blessings.  Similarly, on a recent trip to China, I encountered temples that were built a thousand years ago and named specifically for the celebration of good harvest. This idea of thankfulness and gratitude circles the world and is integrated into every culture.

How is it that cultures around the world have had the same reverence for expressing thankfulness and gratitude over the course of thousands of years?  I’m sure at a basic survival level, initially celebrating good harvest meant that the human population would survive another year.  Having enough to eat to keep on living is always something to be celebrate. But today, with modern technology, fast food, supermarkets and international aid and charity organizations, having some type of food to eat is a little less of the issue now than it once was.  Sadly, it is much easier for us to be complacent about good harvest and blessings now.

However, thankfulness and gratitude couldn’t be more important to have because there is actual science to back up what it does for us physiologically.  Study after study, confirm that people who have high levels of gratitude and thankfulness have higher levels of serotonin. Serotonin is produced in the brain and in the digestive tract and is known as the “feel good” chemical.  People who are mindful and frequently pause to express thanks and gratitude have less depression and higher immune function.

What does that mean on a practical level? Well, it means that grateful people are less withdrawn and more engaged at work and in their families and relationships.  It means that they get sick less often and miss fewer days of work and thereby produce more.  It means that they smile and laugh more and have a calming effect in their sphere of influence.  It means they have more positivity and more energy to be creative, to be active and to make an impact in the world. It means they have higher levels of perceived happiness. It means they live longer.

So how do we become more mindful and grow this positivity and happiness inside of us? The easiest way to grow a positive mind is to write down 5-10 things you are grateful for each day when you wake up and when you go to sleep.  Keep a pen and paper by your bed to stay consistent with this activity. With a little practice, you will be able to recognize many more than 5 to 10 things. This is a simple exercise to build focus on thankfulness and gratitude, and we know that what we focus on, expands. It is the practical application of the ancient teaching, “Count your blessings.”

Let me end by saying that I am grateful for the opportunity to share my thoughts with you in this blog post. I am grateful to those of you who are inspired and inspire others by what you read here.  I am grateful for the technology that let’s us unite around the world to bring positive change to our circles of influence. I am thankful for the growth and peace I have gained by having gratitude.  I am thankful that there are so many people in the world that  are “being” the change they want to see in the world. Happy Thanksgiving to you all, each and every day.

Traci Vincent

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To Be Kind!

iStock_000005573081XSmall[1]When was the last time you opened the door for someone, gave a smile to the person on the elevator or said thank you and have a nice day to your grocery clerk?  I am surprised to see how many people are so oblivious to the world around them.  Going through life unconscious.  I have seen moments of impatience and anger in the coffee line, no one giving up their seat on the bus to the elderly, and another head down buried in their blackberry, texting away bumping into someone and not having the common courtesy to say “excuse me”.  Being considerate, sympathetic and kind appears to be forgotten qualities these days.  I truly believe in practicing the spiritual law of giving.  When you give and I’m not talking just in monetary form, you will get back.  Deepak Chopra teaches: “if you want joy, give joy to others; if you want love, learn to give love; if you want attention and appreciation, learn to give attention and appreciation; if you want material affluence, help others to become materially affluent”.  The best way to get what you want in life is to help other’s get what they want. 

Be kind to yourself.  First and foremost be kind, loving and respectful to yourself.  Stop beating yourself up and give yourself some slack. 

Say a prayer/blessing.  If you have a friend in need say a prayer and give a blessing. You can even give someone you meet a silent blessing wishing them much love and happiness. 

Give a compliment.  When’s the last time you gave a genuine compliment to someone?  Next time you go to the office, compliment your neighbor on how well they look today.  Turn this around, if you receive a compliment don’t dismiss it; accept it with the love and generosity it was intended.

Make the choice.   Make the choice to give and be kind to others.  No matter where you are or who you meet make the decision to give the gift of kindness. You can make a difference in someone’s life. Decide every day to be kind. Make this commitment from Deepka Chopra’s book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success” to put the Law of Giving into effect: “Wherever I go, and whoever I encounter, I will bring them a gift. The gift may be a compliment, a flower, or a prayer.  Today, I will give something to everyone I come into contact with, and so I will begin the process of circulating joy, wealth and affluence in my life and in the lives of others”. 

I want in my life the best for those I come in contact with as much as I want the best for myself.  I find giving empowering and it releases my own thoughts of disappointment.  It certainly makes my heart sing and I choose to move through this world with love and kindness.  Lao Tzu teaches: “Kindness in words creates confidence.  Kindness in thinking creates profoundness.  Kindness in giving creates love.”

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We Will Not Forget!

iStock_000007876191XSmall[1]Tomorrow, November 11th, 2011 is Remembrance Day in Canada, Common Wealth and Veteran’s Day in the United States.   The armistice came into effect at the 1100am hour, of the 11th month, on the 11th day of the year 1918 to end World War I.  Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae of Guelph, Ontario was posted as a medical officer and served at Boulogne No 3 General Hospital as officer in charge of medicine and stayed in this position until his death of pneumonia, on 28 January, 1918.  While serving as a combat doctor he wrote this most notable World War I poem.  As a child I learned it in school and it is still read and studied by our children today -In Flanders Fields:

 In Flanders fields the poppies blow
      Between the crosses, row on row,
   That mark our place; and in the sky
   The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
   Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
         In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
   The torch; be yours to hold it high.
   If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
         In Flanders fields.

My local newspaper, the Ottawa Citizen, reported “starting today and continuing well into the next decade, the Citizen will keep this ancient faith through the modern channel of social media.  Beginning at 11 minutes after 1100am, today, the Twitter account “WeAreTheDead” will begin reciting the names of Canada’s war dead, one each hour of every day.  It will take more than thirteen years to tweet all the names finishing sometime in late June 2025, depending on the number of new entries added to the list. There is no reason why we should only do so once a year, when we march and mourn and pray and lament.”  Bravo Ottawa Citizen, what an incredibly honorable use of social media technology.  

I am a proud Veteran and like my father and grandfather before me, I followed their path and served in the Canadian Armed Forces.  My grandfather’s service brought him to the shores of Dieppe, France.  He was a Medic with the Royal Military Medical Corps.  During Operation Jubilee, August 19th, 1942 he was one of the 6100 troops who stormed the beaches of Dieppe, France. He survived the assault but sustained shrapnel wounds and tuberculosis from the incursion.  In the summer of 1991, while visiting battlefields across Europe, I visited the shorelines of Dieppe.  It was a poignant reminder of the travesty of war and of the over 900 Canadian lives lost on that beach to defend world peace; conversely, kneeling in the sand prayed and gave thanks for my grandfather’s survival and safe return so that I could honor him.

Many years later, my father served on a different front during his 25-year tenure. My father was part of the Canadian contingency of the United Nations Emergency Force (UNEF), at Camp Rafah, Egypt from Sep 1961 to Sep 1962.   The first Canadians arrived in Nov 1956 and to paraphrase the text from the Department of Veterans Affairs Canada:  “The mandate was given to secure the removal of Israeli, British and French troops from the Canal Zone and the Gaza Strip and to maintain peace in the area. The first Canadian troops arrived in Egypt on 24 November 1956, and Egypt abruptly asked them to leave in May 1967, leading to the six-day war between Israel and Egypt. Thirty-two Canadians lost their lives serving with this force.” Again, with overwhelming gratitude, I was blessed that my father was not lost during that conflict.

My 20 years of service included a deployment in Germany from 1989-1993.   I was a proud member of 439 Tactical Fighting Squadron.  Its Battle Honors include Fortress Europe 1944, France and Germany 1944-45, Normandy 1944, Arnhem, Rhine and the 1990-1991 Persian Gulf War, which I participated.  Appreciatively no lives were lost during that campaign.  Every year I took part in Remembrance Day ceremonies however; it was in the years of active service in Europe that I couldn’t be more proud.   I was honored and chosen to represent Canada in Remembrance Day ceremonies with other countries.  

Tomorrow, I will take part to honor and remember, marching alongside my brothers and sisters in arms, with tears of tremendous pride and at the same time, tears of absolute sadness honoring those who had fallen. We Canadian soliders have fought in many battles and continue to do so in our present day in Afghanistan which is now coming to an end; and although no one else in my family since my retirement has worn the uniform, we are forever grateful to those men and women who serve our country with pride and distinction.  I wear my medals and the poppy in honor and with profound respect they who have lost their lives have not died in vain.  “We will remember them”.

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